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The presence of bullies in elementary, middle school, and high school already sound kinda understandable to us. I mean stupid kids picking on kids who have all the pimples, body odor, the puny height, ugly hair, funny socks.. it's not acceptable, oh no, but it's -- like I said -- understandable. I mean they're kids. And stupid. But college students still picking on college students? YES. It may sound unlikely, but college bullies EXIST! Just because you've finally graduated from high school with a wide grin on your face because you're confident you'll never get to see those shit heads again doesn't mean you won't get bullied anymore. The nightmare may be far from over. Ask me. I tried it.
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They would give me a standing ovation when I enter the classroom with comments like, "Here's the Queen of British accent!" On PE practice during weekends, I'd arrive with my usual casual Goth outfits and they'd laugh and whisper to each other and stare at me while I practice the routines. One of them even threw bits of crumpled paper on my face while I narrated a class play in front of everyone. During the acquaintance party, one of them yelled, "Who's the ugliest cosplayer in the world?!" (they meant me obviously, as it's known that I'm the only cosplayer among the Literature majors in school.) What's so annoying is that they love showing me how they love whispering about me. They'd sit next to the table I'm in at the cafeteria then do nothing but just stare at me, snicker, and talk about me.
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When I couldn't take it, I'd walk out in the middle of class and sit down on the floor by the bookshelves in the library or stay seated on the toilet in a restroom and.. well.. cry. I'd ask myself what I ever did wrong to make them do that to me. I've never even talked to them once. The sad thing about my situation is that aside from the fact that I have an awkward relationship with my family and that there's no one I could share my problems to at home, there's no one I could ever cling to or run to among my friends in school because they're all afraid of those bullies as well and they don't wanna get involved. I only had Michael, but it's not like he could really understand and picture out what I was going through. We're from different schools. I skipped many of my classes because of this, and during those class periods I did not show up to, the bullies would turn from horrible to hideous with all their devilish mouths.
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It came to a point when I had to wander aimlessly along the halls in tears, looking for help. I went to three guidance offices in hopes of sympathy, justice, and redemption, but to no avail. I only got humiliated by the dean of the Office of Student Affairs when the three devils were called up to the office to speak up their side in front of me. The dean who happened to be one of the devils' teacher the previous sem dismissed the case, concluding that I wasn't being bullied.
I didn't know what else to do. I had nowhere to go. I wanted to move schools without my parents' knowledge but I know I just can't. :( Anyhoo, the whole issue was resolved -- no, left unjustified, rather -- by a very unsatisfying open forum inside the classroom presided over.. just my classmates.
So to all my precious fellow darklings and bats out there who are or have been bullied, you are not alone. Feeling suicidal and hopeless? Desperate? Left behind? Lonely? Masochistic? Those are pretty natural! I may have written a post about how to cope with bullying but believe me, I still find it really hard when I'm in the situation.
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The best thing you could do about that, I guess, is to ask for HELP. Let everyone know that some idiots out there are emotionally, verbally, or physically abusing you! You can't just let that crime go unheard! AND, equip yourself with the knowledge of anti-bullying regulations and laws to back yourself up! Educate yourself so you can prove to the administrators that these nut heads are hurting you and they need corresponding sanctions!
Stay safe and fight back!
